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Sacrifice

My ear is gone. It seems such a little thing, but at the same time such a large one. Everytime I see my face it is missing a piece. Others will see it and wonder if I wasn’t fast enough, strong enough or clever enough. I wonder if Bennedict felt this way about his arm. The fact that Corwin has his eyes gives me hope that one day I might be whole again, but until then I am marked, flawed, marred. I killed the person who did it, but that gives no satisfaction.

Even less satisfying is the word of what has occurred while we were gone. Years have gone by, and the lack of myself and Constantine appears to have done Amber no good. In fact, Amber is lost. I didn’t realize how important we were to its defense but our enemies sacrificed an entire city as well as one of their own to keep us away.

What truly bothers me though, is who told them we were coming. I do not believe I was spotted when I scouted them, and even so one does not prepare a trap of this magnitude without more evidence than that. It all comes back to their being a traitor within our midst, someone with loyalties outside of the family.

I have my suspicions of who it could very well be, ff I am correct I will kill them for it.

…I will neither forgive nor forget…