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I create nightmares.
On a more serious note, I’m a storyteller with a typewriter (yes you read that right, a TYPEWRITER [manual even]). I will correct your grammar and spelling. Sometimes I’ll even tell you I’m doing it. Probably by printing out the flawed pages and handing them to you marked in red. With a grade. And suggested times for tutoring. Plus fees.
My favorite punctuation mark is the semicolon.
Abuse it and I will find you.